整理

发现自己有点无能。

差个天和地。

I don't know you, but...

J

J is the letter of the month.

As usual, studies make me feel like a complete loser. Again.

It hurts to realize how incompetent you are, in all senses.

Yes, practice makes perfect. I understand. 

But for someone like me, no matter how much I tried,

I'm still like this.

You can say that I'm just underestimating my own ability,

you can say I wasn't hardworking enough,

or even criticize me for being halfhearted in doing things.

It's not like I don't want to change, I tried, I swear,

but it won't work, I don't know whether the problem is in me or just influences,

well, I think both. 

Read an article about how to become a loser in life,

guess what, I don't even need to read that to know how a loser is like in life,

I AM already one. Unsurprisingly, 

the whole article kinda shoot me in the face. It hurts so damn much. 

Anyway, the main aim of that article is for people 

to learn from the negative side of things,

and yet there's someone who can't be taught.

I do have people that I look up to,

people that I respect and admire, 

people that I like and people that I care.

Maybe I'm only matured in terms of appearance?

The older I am the more childish I get,

I just...don't understand? 

Perhaps just me being stuck in the same problem for too long,

I need to take a few steps back and think,

reconsider, and think more.

The question is, how? See my problem?

Btw this isn't an entry for March,

just a very negative side of me got revealed after going through the hell Feb.

x o x o